What comes to mind when you hear, read, think, say the word “erotic”? What do you feel in your body?
Intrigue? Do you blush? Discomfort? Shame?Desire?
As we all understand, it can be used to describe arousing or passionate sexual experiences. But what does it mean in terms of how we live our lives? How can we apply eroticism to all the aspects of life for a whole and fulfilling life experience?
The root word, “Eros” comes from the Greek god of love and simply means the personification of love in all its aspects. The Greek god of love is also associated with creativity, yet, society has deemed that eroticism be confined to the realm of sexual encounters. Audre Lorde states in her essay, “Uses of the Erotic”, that eroticism is both an expression of and contributor to a woman’s creative power.
And I am of this same mind.
But what exactly is the “Erotic” Audrey Lorde spoke of so eloquently? What does that even look like?
Eroticism is something that can’t be explained in a single definition. The very essence of the erotic lies in the realm of the esoteric; it is elusive and mysterious–seductive.
In a recent IG post, I vowed to drip eroticism into every aspect of my life and what I meant by that was that I’d live my life as fully, passionately, loudly and with pleasure. Why not make the decision to live my life in such a way that it creates enjoyment in every aspect no matter the season of life I happen to be in at the time.
Expanding Your Definition of the Erotic
It’s about building an intimate connection with yourself–an awakening of yourself to yourself–and allowing it to spill over into how you show up in your everyday experiences. The better our connection with ourselves, the more authentically we can present ourselves to the world.
It’s the way in which you approach, receive and perceive every situation in your life.
It’s in the full acceptance of what is and letting go of what not longer applies.
It’s the rush of intrigue in your body when you feel inspired or discover something new.
It’s in the kiss a lover for the very first time in a long time.
It is in the passionate grip of hands around your waist and the traces of fingertips against your skin.
It is in the moments of deep sorrow.
It’s in the rising and falling of your chest with each breath.
It’s in sound, movement, joy, love, curiosity, longing and belonging, fantasy and mystery.
It’s in the very moment you bring something tangible to life that was once held only in your imagination.
It can be all these things at once. Eroticism is woven into the complexity of our feminine energy, sensuality and sexuality. It is in everything we feel deeply and the foundation of our spiritual and human experience.
The erotic requires you to be completely present, aware and receptive in every moment; it can not exist without your full attention. I am a student of the erotic in my own life and I encourage you to seek it out for yourself. And do so without judgement; observe and witness yourself with compassionate love and enthusiastic curiosity. You’ll be delighted with what unfolds and how you choose to express it as it invites you into parts of yourself that would otherwise remain unknown.